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Wonderfully Exhausted

So, here we are, one week in to this new life with a newborn.

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We are as exhausted as we’ve ever been, but we are also over the moon happy and grateful for the opportunity to be exhausted.

We will gladly get up multiple times a night to feed, change, and soothe our sweet baby, because we have experienced the alternative.

Madeline’s cries in the middle of the night are a beautiful and welcome sound in our home. We are grateful daily for those cries, because we faced the deafening silence of returning home without Joshua last year.

So far Madeline is not a fan of not being held. She very much prefers to be in mom or dad’s arms at all times. We will gladly hold her all day long, because we can still remember the desperate ache of empty arms.

Madeline has gone a long way to heal some of the broken places in our hearts, but those wounds are still there. At times I feel like I am feeling them fresh and new again. Each time I look at our sweet girl I can’t help but think of what was taken from us by not having these moments with Joshua. My love for both of my children grows with every breath. Madeline in no way replaces Joshua in our hearts or our lives. There will always be a place in home that feels empty.

On a brighter note, this sweet girl of ours is amazing. She has brighten our home and is just a complete joy.

She had her first doctor’s appointment yesterday and had gained 3 ounces since coming home. Yea! She is now 7 pounds, 4 ounces and still measuring 20 inches long. She is just perfect according to everyone we meet. We couldn’t agree more.

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